それをネジ

3 06 2011

私は彼を嫌いではありません。彼は友人だった。あまりにも良い友人。しかし、今、私は彼の顔を見てうんざり。見ているだけは、私は彼が何をしたかを考えることができます。 “あなたの夢を見て、あなたの考える”。 “ブラッシュ、かわいい音が…あなたをそらすためにしたくない。”とか、他の。吐き気病気。

 

私は英語ではない言語で書いています。言論の自由。

 

-.-

 

 

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beginning to…

1 06 2011

I used to be an emo lil thing. I would never be fully satisfied with myself, my hair, my pimples, and most of all, my skills.

I started guitar when I was a kid in Form 1. Seeing people like Justin and Shaun play made me wanna quit. And I did. I loved singing and joined the choir. Everyone there was great. My voice was cracking. I never reached the notes the other tenors could reach, and I lost my voice almost every Friday after practice.

I learned to speak in front of a crowd from Standard 2. A nerve-wrecking experience that made me pee in my pants. Not literally, but yeah, I could feel my urethra quivering.

I had my first girlfriend, and I was jealous all the time, didn’t give her breathing space, and she loved me still.

I jumped off a ten-foot wall. The gravity hit my balls hard, and I writhed in agony.

Everything’s got a beginning. Everyone was a beginner before.

I pretty much believe, now, that whatever I’m learning, however stupid I look, I’ll know I’m a beginner. Beginners are allowed to fail. To be a master, you gotta be a beginner.

“You’re a beginner when it comes to being you every new day, you’re a beginner all the time.” -Jason Mraz.

 

I am a beginner.





love is a dog

26 05 2011

I know I have to make space for it, but sometimes, I don’t even know what it bit me for.





no time

25 05 2011

No time to blog! Exams are coming! Must get straight A’s! Ergo, I’ve got no time for a nice long diary post. So I’ll resort to some skills learned from Tumblr, to make up for a thousand words using a picture. Doesn’t work as well, but it pretty much sums up my status right now. Love you guys.

Reblog if you like. :p

P.s.: I wanna love you long time.





this is an abozzo.

16 05 2011

If I remember correctly, ‘abozzo’ means a rough, preliminary sketch. Which is really what my blog’s about, really. I don’t think I have any drafts. I just write, and spit. I bet alot of bloggers are like that. 😀

So, I’m pretty much on the right track. As rusted as my uncle’s car, but going strong. Studying’s fun (which is all my mom could ever ask for), got great new friends, great old friends, and I’m on the way to finding my college love.

That makes me pretty content and satisfied, and even relieved. To know that I wasn’t doing well in school just cause I was too arrogant to understand the teaching methods of high school teachers. In college, it’s a whole different ball game.

And the stress is healthy. Helps me keep going, keep learning. And other bullshit!!

I’m as ready to spring forward another few steps like a cat.

Could life get any better than this? *smiles happily

…Actually, it could.





well all these things…

12 05 2011
That’s why I kinda like circles.




Do You Honestly Get Where I’m Coming From?

8 05 2011

By the way, just to make sure my message is clear, the guy who sparked it all, the one who caused me to snap is called Damien Woo Win Kit. Know him or not, whatever. Just gonna stick it here.

(My conversation with a friend)

Do you truly get where I’m coming from? I wanna explain to you bit by bit. I’m a free thinker. I bet all the CF members or Christians I know know that by now. And I try my best to attend all the church events anyone invites me to, eventhough sometimes I just sit there like a dumb idiot while the guy who invited me goes off to find his friends.

And I listen. I listen every single time, about your views, your faith, and everything. Some even stick it in my face.

“God is good! Praise Him!”

“Without Him, life is pointless. Your life right now, is absolutely pointless.”

“Be with God, and you will not go to Hell!”

I’m not sick of it. I truly am not. I listen, I want to listen, I want to know. That’s not the problem.

It just fucking breaks my heart, when the people who stick it in my face and make me listen, won’t listen to anything else.

You know, all that the people in the video said was “Pre-marital sex is okay” (with some exceptions). They did not say: “Hey, I just fucked a girl, with a condom and all, she’s not pregnant. GO. FUCK.”

It’s not like we had sex. It’s just an opinion. And some douchebag (Beatbox something) commented “I bet that girl did it before. JUST SAYING.” with all the sarcasm a dumb bitch could muster.

And Shermaine or Emily (can’t remember) was agreeing, saying stuff like “Yeah, she talks like she’s so experienced.”

Do you know how disgusted you make me?

Do you know how sick it makes me feel? You, you and your faith, saying things like that?

No respect. For any views besides their own. That’s why I’m upset. To the point of anger. You anger me. My perceptions on you have altered.

You fucking break my heart.